Lifesense

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6 Meadowcourt Road, London, Greater London, SE3 9DY

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About Us

I'm a life coach specialising in personal and spiritual development. I help people to think about where they want to be and help them put steps in place to get there. I use a number of tools and techqniques including NLP, psychometric profiling, hypnotherapy, and EFT. If you'd like to know more please contact me or see www.lifesense.co.uk

I resolve to.....

There are particular periods of the year when we start to think about what we want to achieve in life. Such as a birthday where we realise we’re another year older and perhaps haven’t yet done all the things we thought we’d have done by that time. Or perhaps New Year, where we “resolve to do better” at some things and “resolve to give up” others.Goals, aims, ambitions, and dreams are all brilliant ways of helping to give ourselves direction and motivation in our lives. They’re a way of giving us things to work towards and a good way of seeing how far we’ve come when we go back and review them. Remember though, it is the journey to the end that is just as important as reaching the final destination – if not more so. And, of course, there is no “final destination” per se. When we reach one end point, it is just the beginning point of another journey.So aims are good things. Aren’t they? If they’re set by you because you want to achieve them then yes, absolutely. If they’re set by others because that’s what theythink you should be doing perhaps they’re not so helpful. It’s very easy for others to stand outside of your life and your experience and tell you what you should or should not be doing. We are all different and our paths vary from person to person – whether or not that seems obvious to us. We all have a slightly different model of the world and how it should be run and that’s not necessarily a bad thing, because it means we get diversity of views and so can embrace the best of the best to make this world a much more wonderful place to live in.However, when it comes to setting aims and goals, all too often we feel the pressure of society, our family, friends, or peers telling us things that they think would be good for us. “You should give up smoking”, “You should lose a bit of weight”, “You should be more helpful around the home”, “You should learn to be more assertive” (Oh the irony at that last statement!). And the common word in all those “resolutions” is, of course, “should”. When I hear that word sometimes I find it hard not to go “aaaaaaaaargh”!So what should we do instead of listening to shoulds? ? My answer to that is, do what feels right to you and what you want to do and not what other people think you “should” do! Decide what your goals, aims, dreams, and achievements are by whatyou (and yes I do mean YOU) want. If you want to give up smoking then set a workable aim to do so. If you want to shed some excess weight and become fitter, do it because you know it will make you feel good when you’ve achieved it. If you want to be more on time for things do it because you can see how it will benefit you and those around you. Do none of these things “because that’s what you do at the beginning of each year” or “because you really should”, or “because it would make other people happy”.Now you may think there’s a selfish theme running through these ponderings. And you’d be right! How on earth can you expect to help others be happy if you’re not happy in your own skin or with what you’re working towards? Better to choose aims and dreams that make you happy and motivate you than choose goals that you procrastinate over, get angry about, and/or drag your heals kicking and screaming to the end. Life was meant to be about joy, happiness, creation, expansion, beauty, sharing, and love – God didn’t make life hard for us, we do that ourselves!

Taking time out

It can be great, can’t it – being busy I mean. Whether with work, homelife or with friends and family. When you’re doing something you enjoy it can be a real pleasure to be with other people or being busy with our work. Time seems to pass by so quickly and, before you know it, it’s the end of the weekend or the end of the week, or the end of the month or year! I hear so many people at the moment saying things like “where does the time go?” and “I can’t believe we’re nearly at the end of 2009 already!”. Time is moving on. What’s that phrase “time and tide wait for no man” – and it is so incredibly true. As we get older time seems to go by a little quicker each day. Esoterically of course that is also actually happening with the Earth spinning slightly faster each year. But enough of that for now… So back to this "time whisking by us" business. Like I said – it can be a lot of fun being around other people. But there also comes a time when we need to rest and take time out for ourselves. This can seem a bit tricky for those with families and children – as there always seems to be something that needs doing or some need that others have that you need to meet or deal with. Where does it all stop though? When do you get to the point where you have to say “enough” or you’ll drop? Should we even be allowing ourselves to get to the stage where we’re nearly dropping before we say “enough”? The short answer to that, of course, is no. Now I know there are people who will be reading this and saying “well that’s easier said than done” and words to that effect. Excuse my bluntness people – but that’s just an excuse. You’re allowing yourself to be a bit of a victim. Now I know there are some who won’t like to hear that and may even switch off from here, and that’s fine. There are times, though, when we need to wake up and smell the coffee. Ask yourself this: would you knowingly put other people through the pressure you put yourself under at times, with the understanding that it could potentially make them ill or break them? Of course you wouldn’t. So what makes you any less deserving of time out and support from others? Christmas is a typical time when people are running about like headless chickens trying to get everything done so that “everyone has a good time”. What about you though? How does it feel to be so knackered from sorting everything and everyone else out that you’re too tired to enjoy it yourself? “ah but it’s for the Children” (Christmas that is). I’m not going to use my usual word here, suffice to say it begins with a ‘B’ and ends with an ‘s”! Nonsense! Christmas is for enjoying for everyone who wishes to take part. So this year, instead of whisking about like a blue-bummed-fly – think about what needs to be done. To whom can you delegate things? From whom can you ask for help? Does it all really need to be done? If you hear yourself saying things like “I must” or “I can’t” or “I’ve got to” you need to take a step back and ask yourself why you’re giving your power away. We all choose what to think and what to feel and, more importantly, we ALL have a choice about whether or not we do something. Of course there are going to be outcomes from our choices – and we can decide whether those outcomes would be acceptable to us or not. But we ALWAYS have a choice. So as you’re preparing yourself for the season’s festivities this year, make sure you build in some time out for yourself. Ask for help where and when you need it, and don’t allow yourself to fall into the mode of being a martyr or victim. You are just as deserving of a good time (and quiet time when you need it) as everyone else. Now… go get that mince pie and put your feet up for 10 minutes!

Becoming mired in the quicksand of negativity

The other day I was on the telephone to a client (I'll her Susan) who was quite stressed about a situation she was dealing with and she didn't know what to do about it. As many people do, when they have to deal with things that appear scary, Susan was beginning to panic about what to do next and what the consequences of her actions, or any lack of action would result. I could hear her beginning to get almost hysterical and tearful so I immediately got her to stop and doing some breathing techniques to re-centre herself, followed by a couple of drops of rescue remedy. Just reminding her to focus on where she was right then, in that moment, was helpful in itself. We then had a more calm conversation about what she could do next to deal with the challenge she was facing. Happily I received an email from Susan this morning telling me that everything was OK and that the fears that were causing her to panic didn't transpire BUT apparently only because she'd managed to stay calm and centred.Now there's a long introduction to my blog.... Sometimes it's helpful to set the scene in a bit of detail though I think ?So, let's get back to Susan and her dilemma. Imagine if I'd not helped her calm down and, instead, joined in and added to her fears about what might have happened. The outcome would most likely have been very different from the positive one, and Susan would have been in a worse state. There's no point becoming mired in the quicksand of negativity to help someone get out of it. You'll end up getting mired yourself and most likely make the other person sink faster! It's better to help a person to calm and centre, then help them find the rope or branch on which they can pull themselves out of the quicksand.It's also not helpful to tell them that they're no good and that they'll never be able to get out of the situation - all you're doing there is adding more despair and fear, and are more likely to help tip them over the edge. After all, would you like someone to tell you that you're no good when you're dealing with your own pit of quicksand? Of course not. We ask our friends for help in finding the rope that will pull us out back onto solid, dry ground not ask them to help us drill ourselves deeper!Life never sends us anything that we're unable to deal with. It may send us things that really stretch us. It may even send us things that we cannot deal with alone (which happens often). The thing to do is not be too proud and ask for help when we need it. But allowing ourselves to get drawn into someone else's drama such that we also become mired in the quicksand of negativity isn't helpful for the person we're trying to help or ourselves.This goes for all forms of negative emotions, not just when others are in a state of panic about what to do next. Gossiping with someone about other people, joining in a person's anger about someone else, worry about what someone will do to resolve a situation, worrying about someone who you know is ill or unwell, and so on. I'm not saying don't be empathetic and supportive - absolutely not. BUT, don't get drawn into worrying, don't get drawn into gossiping, and don't get drawn into the anger. All these things inhibit a person from seeing the way out of the quicksand and all you do is end up getting mired in there with them.It's worth paying attention to the interactions you're having and see whether you're being drawn into someone's quicksand of negativity. If you are, then you know what to do: re-centre yourself and get back onto dry, stable ground. Gossip, anger, fear, hate, resentment, worry, and panic will all mire you, and the person to whom you're speaking, more deeply in the negativity - and that will just draw more negative stuff to you. Better to stay on solid ground, hold the rope, and give positive encouragement.

Specialist Services

I specialise in two key areas: Spiritual Evolution and personal development, Self confidence and self esteem I also use a range of vibrational essences to help you with your personal development and your spiritual evolution. The ranges of essences I use are: Essence of Illumination - for spiritual evolution and transcending the Ego Self Sacred Heart Essence - balancing chakras and dealing with life issues Essence of Abundance - for becoming comfortable with attracting and having abundance in you